FREE STUFF ALERT: Free “Diet” Taco from Taco Bell
Posted by breadwinner on January 3rd, 2010
The original.
The new girl.
Christine: Thanks! I’ve been on a diet. It was pretty easy, really.
Jared: Yeah, dieting is easy.
<nervous chuckling>
Christine: Anyways, I’ll see you later!
Jared: Wait! What diet were you on?
Christine: The Drive Thru Diet! It’s from Taco Bell!
Jared: %*&@#! Why the hell did I eat all that fake turkey shit?!
Not sure if you’ve heard the news, but now we fatass Americans can keep eating fast food AND still lose weight! Fantastic! That’s just the permission I needed…now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to ride my sloth cart to the closest drive thru and—
Wait, what’s that you say?
The diet is only from Taco Bell? That’s not too bad. I like tacos and queso and whatnot. But it’s only their “Fresco Menu”? Where there’s no cheese, guac or sour cream to be found!? Shut the front door!
If you can fit through it.
Print yours out online. Click this coupon!
Yeah. Apparently this girl named Christine had non-typical weight loss after replacing her diet of what I can only imagine included an all Carl’s Junior burgers and funnel cake diet with the aforementioned Fresco items. The difference in caloric intake presumably aided in her slimming down to the lovely specimen seen in Taco Bell’s new TV spots. And the best part of the whole thing is that they’re giving out FREE tacos so we can all try it and get skinny together! Maybe I’ll have two! Or five! Annnnd there’s the rub.
Personally, I think Christine is way hotter than Jared, but either way the whole “Drive Thru Diet” is just like a fat dude pre-colonic: full of shit.
Unless the Taco Bell version of the Subway diet involves eating a Fresco burrito and a Fresco taco for lunch and a similar combination of two Fresco items for dinner, which considering the average fast food order is pretty unrealistic, I don’t see this diet working out mathematically-speaking. That coupled with the fact that tortilla + chicken or beef + lettuce + spoonful salsa does not equal a balanced diet. What about the lycopene, you ask?! Oh shut up. Even if you lose weight, I doubt your greasy-fingered ass would have the energy to get up off the couch. BUT I digress…
The point here is that free shit is still free, so go get your non-low calorie free taco today. Then, considering the New Year and those damn resolutions, consider actual diet and exercise. For real.
Enjoy!
Like free stuff? Hit breadwinner up on Twitter.
And thanks to @ashleyestrello for the tipoff.
Tags: burrito, christine, diet, free stuff alert, fresco, jared, taco bell
I don’t like to haphazardly throw this word around but this Taco Bell “diet” is simply retarded. I keep waiting for Taco Bell to reveal that the entire thing is a joke.
And the meat product shown in that Taco looks like dog shit.
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This post was mentioned on Twitter by inthiseconomy: @ashleyestrello ROGER THAT! http://bit.ly/5nytLW FREE STUFF ALERT!…
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