For Shame: Letterman Lets The Economy Down
Posted by breadwinner on March 25th, 2009
justice of the peace? really?!
Mazel Tov! David Letterman and Regina Lasko got married in a surprise super secret ceremony on March 19th. Super secret? I see, so obviously everyone must have known and therefore been there to pilfer it, right? Well I scoured the internet looking for TMZ-style photos featuring pukeloads of flowers coming out of everywhere, giant diamonds, maybe even a sneak peek at a reception menu featuring a thousand pounds of lobster. You know, the usual pomp and circumstance Hollywood weddings tend to have.
But not this wedding. Nope. This fairy tale story sounds more like one you hear about an old college buddy who finally tied the knot with the girl he’d been dating for a decade (or in Dave’s case, two). Yep. These two were together for a jaw-dropping 23 years. Who does this guy think he is, Heffner? According to Extra — which is obviously a credible source — Dave was worried he’d be seen as less cool for getting married. And I always thought the guy was confident in himself. I mean, nobody who looks like him goes on TV in front of millions and doesn’t have a decent self-image. Whatever. Here’s the point: Mr. Late Night took in a reported 45 million last year. He can certainly afford to pump up the freakin’ economy with some platinum wedding-style shit! I mean come ON.
He managed to don a tux for whatever award show this was...
Okay so maybe Dave was being sensitive to the current state the public is in. Maybe the trend in celebrity fashion and celebrity jewelry-wearing is bleeding into the celebrity wedding industry. Come to mention it, I haven’t heard about any big blowout matrimonies in a while. Not since Mariah, I believe, and that was last May! Speaking of Mariah, Mr. Carey (otherwise known as Nick Cannon) was in the “news” yesterday for blogging about just how able he was to afford Mariah’s engagement bling. He said, “First off, I wish my wife’s ring did only cost $500,000, that would have been a deal!” But then he joked, “as for the payment plan thing, I wish that was true or possible!! Sh–, it’s a recession, I would take a lay-away plan in a minute! Hahhaahaa!!” Oh how I love when rich celebrities joke about having economic problems. Poor people are so damn precious!
Back to the new Lettermans. Get this: they honeymooned with their son! In Montana! WTF?! And on their way to the courthouse, the truck (???) they were driving got stuck in the mud! Is this a celebrity wedding or an episode of My Big Redneck Wedding?
How can such insanely rich people have such average personal lives? These two lovebirds met at work! How normal is that? Here’s how it works: celebrities get to be worth a shit-ton of money and have a fabulously high quality of life. And in return, what we non-celebs get to do is to make fun of their ostentatious, silly, train wrecks of personal lives! It’s only fair.
Here’s the point: celebrities need to man up and make fools of themselves again. Or at least save the economy with ridiculous amounts of spending.
Because in this economy, we need all the distraction we can get.
Tags: David Letterman, economy, honeymoon, justice of the peace, Mariah Carey, married, Nick Cannon, Regina Lasko, secret
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Tom Humes
Thanks Tom. We’ll come check you out too.