In This Economy?

Let’s face it — sex sells. And it definitely does when it’s first-time virgin sex with this chick. According to Fox News, Natalie Dylan (that’s not her real name, folks) partnered up with Las Vegas brothel The Moonlite Bunny Ranch to offer her cherry-dipped cone to the highest bidder. (Sorry, DQ, that was inappropriate.) But I digress. In September of 2008 she announced her plans on the Howard Stern show. By January of this year she was up to 3.8 million, a total of 10,000 bidders (including “weirdos” and “rich businessmen”), and a book deal. Quite the lucrative biz opp.

She certainly looks like a virgin...

Not surprisingly, many people from religious groups to lawmakers were up in arms over this (they’re probably just mad they didn’t think of it first), but there’s little that can be done to stop Miss Dylan. That’s because she was technically selling her “virtue” in Nevada, where prostitution is very much legal. She’s not a minor, either. So the Bunny Ranch and Dylan got a big bailout from all this.

Auction inspired by capitalism. Photo inspired by Miley?

Supposedly, “Natalie” was inspired by “an article she came across while researching thesis ideas.” The things kids learn in school these days! She is basically copying a Peruvian woman’s idea to sell herself to pay off medical bills. Only this Kim Kardashian-wannabe intends to pay off her education, her sister’s education, and — she admits — become financially stable.

So she definitely wasn’t the first, but she wasn’t the last, either. This Italian model/actress/devout Catholic came onto the scene last November, offering the same thing, but in a hotter — and younger — package.

Again, I digress. Back to 22-year-old Natalie. Tongue ring? Check. Kim Kardashian-style diggs? Check. Had oral sex before? Check. Open-minded? Check. Sister who’s a prostitute? Check. No wonder she’s willing to undergo “an exam” to prove she’s pure — all the facts are certainly stacked against her on that one.

And what did Dylan have to say for herself? She cited capitalism as the reason for her choice to sell her chastity. Here’s a video of her interview on CNN where she explains, “I think this is a capitalist society, and I definitely want to capitalize on this.” She’s also been quoted as saying she’s shocked “that men will pay so much for someone’s virginity, which isn’t even prized so highly anymore.” Well put, Natalie.

But there’s even more video goodness. Here’s an awesome clip from September 2008 when she went on the Tyra Banks show. I recommend you pay particular attention to the audience reactions throughout. On Tyra’s show Natalie was pretty clear that her first time will not necessarily be with the highest bidder. Because eBay-style would just be trashy. She planned to “get to know the guys first,” which included both criminal background checks and STD tests. Then her plan was to select her mister from there. How romantic.

Well, the winner was chosen, and he happened to be the suitor who showed up to the Tyra show and met Miss Thang in person, resulting in a disgustingly uncomfortable train wreck that was obviously totally worth watching. His name is Lee, he’s 59, and that seems to be all I could find about him. If anyone has any more info on this Lee character, let us know.

The best part? She’s currently earning a masters degree in marriage and family therapy. Therapy, huh. Well, I think she’ll be able to start with herself.

Tags: bunny ranch, economy, natalie dylan, virgin

This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 17th, 2009 at 9:58 AM and is filed under Deals & Free Stuff, Humor. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.