Warren Buffett and binge drinking
Posted by breadwinner on March 9th, 2009
Is he in a sauna because he's sweating the numbers? NOPE.
I don’t, but maybe you all remember about five months ago when the great Warren Buffett (who as I’m writing this I prefer to imagine looking more like the great Jimmy Buffett) expressed marked optimism in encouraging Americans to continue to invest in the stock market. Let’s rewind and do a little back story: according to everyone’s favorite non-encyclopedia, Wikipedia, Mr. Buffett is the richest person in the world with an estimated net worth of $62.0 billion. And I’m thinking when “one of the world’s most successful investors” tells you that investing is a good idea, you probably listen. Although on the other hand, with that kind of net worth he probably doesn’t care too much about little people like us.
Sometimes it's just TOO easy...
Anyway, forget what you may or may not have heard five months ago from old Billionaire Buffy, because he’s fully changed his tune. Now he has said our current economy has “fallen off a cliff,” and that what we’re experiencing now is a “worst case scenario.” Basically, to put it in the words of the other Buffett, we’re all “wasting away” on Wall Street-ville. Fan-fucking-tastic, because I just love margaritas.
[Warren] Buffett also added — quite realistically — that the economy “can’t turn on a dime,” and that he expects we’ll see about a 5-year recovery. Now, my favorite part (but it could just be the margaritas talking at this point) is that he mentioned how scared and reactionary the public is in a comment that led to the public becoming scared and reactionary. Look out beloooooooooow!
In addition to the ‘fear catch 22′ going on, there’s a certain level of obvious sketchiness as the Bloomberg.com article continues: “Wells Fargo & Co. increased 21 percent to $10.38 after Buffett told CNBC that business at the fourth-largest U.S. bank in three years looks “better than ever.” Buffett’s Berkshire Hathaway Inc. owns 6.9 percent of the bank’s stock.” So to sum it up, Buffy announces that Wells Fargo is doing great, which leads to Wells Fargo’s stock shooting way up, which leads to Buffy profiting since his company owns some of it. Yeah, that’s not shady at all.
The article did say to take what Buffy says with a grain of salt...
I’m just going to go ahead and apologize in advance for getting this song stuck in your head, but I had to. “Some people say that there’s a woman to blame, but I know” it’s Warren Buffet’s damn fault!
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Which gives me an idea for a new drinking game: Whenever Warren Buffett says something good about the stock market, take a sip of your margarita. And whenever Warren Buffett says something bad about the stock market, take two shots of tequila.
Let’s see how long it takes for us all to pass out.
Tags: CNBC, jimmy buffett, margarita, warren buffett, wells fargo, worst case scenario
I’m gonna play the game sitting Buffet-style (as pictured above).
Otherwise known as “Mommy, I just fell off my bike and hit my knee and now I have a boo-boo” style.
I’m just now reading this post, but I shit you not, yesterday I opened a Buffett-based IRA. Today I’m effing loaded. Okay only the first part is true.
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